And You Thought One Lie Couldn't Hurt by Susan Lee

Author: Susan Lee
Story Title: And You Thought One Lie Couldn't Hurt
Story URL: http://www.2oneday.com/forum/index.php?showtopic=21137
Reviewer: DarkAngel | lostshadows.co.nr

*Even though it shows up as complete, I can only read up to chapter 14. Did you delete it, because I can’t access it.


Title: 5/5

-The title was interesting. It caught my eye, and I could tell that it wasn’t going to be one of those “happy” stories. It’s a little long for my liking, but it suits the story well.


Poster/Background: 7/10

-The poster looks really nice! There’s a sad touch to it. The blends of colors really mix together good, and the character pictures just top it off. The text is nice and easy to read too. Because there is no background, I have to deduct some points off.


Forewords: 4/5

-That was a very nice preview! It was really sad, and it put me in one of those ‘moods’ as they call it. You introduced us to Yoobin’s personality and thoughts, so kudos for that, but I think that you could have added an introduction of the other characters. Other than that, it was good!


Plot: 15/15

-It’s really good so far! You keep adding twists, and keep the audience wanting more! I barely know what’s going to happen since you always add different things! It’s always interesting, and I can’t tear my eyes off for one second :) It’s exciting and suspenseful to know what’s going to happen next.


Flow: 10/10

-The flow was good. It wasn’t too fast, nor was it too slow. From the beginning, to the end, the events all flow together well. Nothing seems out of place. Each event is important to the story as it progresses.


Spelling/Grammar/Vocabulary: 14/15

-I only spotted one or two mistakes. You either check over your writing, or don’t make many mistakes. Kudos for that!


Characterization: 10/10

-As the story went on, I found myself liking the characters- even Jessica! The way Yoobin began to change was smooth, along with the other main characters. Taecyeon likes her again, but Jay is the only one that I’m sad about. It’s interesting to see how they react to the upcoming events. Unlike many other fanfiction stories, the plot isn’t realistic. This, however, can be imagined in real life.


Originality: 9/10

-The rivalry and blackmailing is seen often, but the others are unique. I would have never guessed how Jay figured out that Yoobin really didn’t slap Jessica. Keep it up, and your readers will be rooting for more!


Writing style: 10/10

-I really don’t have a problem with your writing style! You write complete sentences, and create full paragraphs. The spacing is fine, and the format looks neat and clean!


Overall enjoyment: 10/10

-I really enjoyed every minute of it! It was interesting to read, and I wish I can read more! Full points for ‘overall enjoyment’!


Overall score: 94/100