Lacrimosa Terra by .flavored

Title: Lacrimosa Terra
Author: .flavored
Story URL: http://www.winglin.net/fanfic/flavored_6/
Reviewed by RyoMaXMaSuke@lostshadows.co.nr
Note: I’m really sorry for taking long. I’ve been really busy lately and sleepy, so every time I try to review a story, sleepiness takes over me. I hope you forgive. I am really sorry.


Title: 4/5
- I have absolutely NO IDEA whatsoever of what the title means but it did caught my eye, for it was very unique. I somehow see the connection of the story with the title, even though you haven’t exactly pointed that fact out yet. Well, the way they were mentioning the title in the story, I think all of the events were happening because of “Lacrimosa Terra”.


Poster/Background: 8/10
- I actually like your poster very much. I like it because it’s so simple yet it was elegant and beautifully designed. I also think the picture of the boys in the picture matches it. And even though there’s no background, I think the white color goes with the poster and I also think that a background is no longer needed.


Forewords: 4/5
- I ABSOLUTELY love your forewords. The way you wrote it was absolutely fantastic. I love your unique use and choice of words. Although, you could maybe put a little introduction for the characters but nevertheless, it was fantastic.


Plot: 12/15
- You plot is quite interesting yet, it is very confusing. It was very hard keeping track of the events in the story, everything just seems to happen. But, what I like in your plot is, it was full of mystery. It just captivates me and pulls me in to read the story more.


Flow: 5/10
- The flow of the story was, for me, unstable. The story was dragged a little bit because of the length of the chapters, but the events in each chapter was happening a bit too fast, I think it’s because of the quantity of the characters. When you first read the story, you get confused because this was happening to a certain group, then this was happening to another. Also, it lessened my understanding of the story.


Spelling/Grammar/Vocabulary: 13/15
- I have to admit, I thought you would get a perfect score for this, but as I read on, I found several minor mistakes. They weren’t anything big, but you still have to be careful though. Your sentences were a bit too short and you had a lot of fragmented sentence, that isn’t really attractive, so, I suggest you work on that. Proofreading would help a lot.


Characterization: 7/10
- I TRULY admire you for having such a big number of characters and for keeping track of them. I admit, I was a little confused at first, wondering who was this and that, but as I read, I started to remember the characters very well. You portrayed their personalities very well too. I like the personalities of the characters in your story because, it seems like all of them have a hint of mystery behind them. For me, the characters or rather couple that appeals to me is, Curione and Ash. I like them because they are very mysterious yet funny and very amusing. I somehow don’t like and like when the characters suddenly pop up. I don’t like because I’d be going “Another one,” but I do like it because it someone unexpected.


Originality: 10/10
- I’ve never read a story like this before. All parts of the story were very original.


Writing style: 7/10
- I’ve read the reviews you’ve received, I have to agree to the reviewers, in chapters one and two, you wrote very formal and descriptive sentences, but as it goes on, you wrote informally, making it funny, but you kind of lost your descriptive writing. You started being less descriptive of the surroundings of the characters and what was happening. I think—noticing that you’re very creative—you will find a way to be very descriptive in your sentences, yet funny and amusing.


Overall enjoyment: 9/10
- There were some confusions with the story but I enjoyed it very much. It was a very exciting, amusing, funny, and mysterious fanfic. When I saw this on winglin, I actually almost read it. I’m very glad you chose me as the reviewer, I found another GREAT fanfiction. I wish you all the best, and who knows, I might continue reading this story. >_~




Overall score: 79/100