We’re Just Friends by Babbykrazi4u

Title: We’re Just Friends
Author: Babbykrazi4u
Story URL: http://www.winglin.net/fanfic/Babbykrzi4u/
Reviewed by: jjwyl@lostshadows.co.nr
Note: I hope you don’t get upset with this score. I was trying my best to give you a good score. But your story is addicting! I hope the next time I review your story I can give you higher marks. =]


Title: 2.5/5
I’m not able to give you a high score for this section because to be honest, if I were to look down a column of story titles, yours would not be the first one that I go to because it doesn’t really stand out much. I would recommend adding a symbol, like a star or heart, right beside the title so that it attracts more attention. But you were able to connect the title with the story itself, so that’s good.


Poster/Background: 8/10
I love the poster. The pictures look amazing and I like how the title is placed in the middle area where everyone can spot it at once. The font style used was also appropriate. And the color of the poster gives me the feeling of mystery and judgment, which in the story you are able to tell us. I think the background is a bit too plain and I would recommend changing the chapter title color from that sky blue into a darker color to match the poster and background.

Forewords: 3/5
It’s not the most exciting foreword I’ve read, but somehow it does make me want to continue because for me, I prefer stories that are based on school life. Your summary of the story wasn’t too long or too short, which is good because if it was too long, you’d bore the readers and practically tell them the entire story. But if it was too short, it wouldn’t give enough details the reader and would get them hooked on.

Plot: 12.5/15
Your plot so far, is quite well thought out. It seems like you know what you’re doing. But I’m going to have to say that I find your story a bit cliché. I mean, there are a lot of stories out there that has a nerd falling for a popular guy or vice-versa.


Flow: 8.5/10
The flow of your story so far is pretty good. ____’s feelings for Jaejoong isn’t developing too fast, which is good. The only thing that I think is a bit rushed is when Donghae and Kim get together. You should show us that scene, so we can experience it ourselves.

Spelling/Grammar/Vocabulary: 12/15

I saw quite a few grammar and vocabulary mistakes. Even in just the foreword, you kept on changing your grammar tense. I saw that you would use past tenses and then automatically change into present tenses. Try to stick to one tense.

Characterization: 6.5/10
Because you put information on the main characters in the foreword, I was able to have a better grasp on each of them. It’s always a good idea to have some information in the foreword. As the story went on, I was able to learn more about the main girl and Jaejoong. But because, as you said, there are many side characters, I wasn’t able to tell a lot about them. Because there were so many characters in this story, I lost track of who liked who and such.

Originality: 7.5/10
Refer to PLOT

Writing style: 7.5/10
I just wanted to say that I enjoy reading stories that are written like yours, nice and simple. But the downside is, next time don’t use a “_____” for the character’s name. You should actually put a name in there because when I was reading it, I felt like the line was kind of getting in the way and made everything seem a bit messy. Also, try bunching up sentences together to form bigger paragraphs instead of single sentences.

Overall enjoyment: 9/10
I love DBSK! So that’s a plus. And I also love stories where the geek falls in love with the popular guy.

Overall score: 77/100